One Month Later

It has been exactly one month since I have come home from Israel. So far, life has been decent. I love seeing my family and friends, being in my neighborhood, enjoying the beauty that is all around me.

But in many ways, I feel like I have left a home behind. I miss my community, my school, being in a city so diverse in its Judaism that it has something for everyone. I miss the hustle and bustle of Jerusalem before Shabbat or before a holiday, getting to the grocery store right when it opens to avoid the nonexistent lines. I miss sitting in classrooms and the Beit Midrash, studying Torah, halacha, and Talmud, discussing with teachers topics that have been discussed by some of the great rabbis of the past 2000 years.

When I first arrived in Israel, I felt like I was in exile. I was cut off from my friends and family, knew no one, and even my roommate wasn't around to help me out. Eventually, I made friends, created a family, and had a wonderful life full of love and learning. Now, I feel like I am in exile once again. My family doesn't understand the new practices I have taken on and I feel like I cannot open my mouth to say anything to anyone. Everything everyone around me talks about sounds so superficial now.

Will it ever get better?